The section that I read in A New Earth (Eckhart Tolle, 2006) last night was about us allowing ourselves to loose our concept of time. Not 'clock-time' obviously - we need that for the practicalities of life, appointments, planning etc but our perception and concept of time - being our obsession with the past and/or the future. By disregarding 'time' we are able to be freed from the horizontal restrictions it has on us and therefore giving ourselves the gift of being able to expand vertically - into an entirely new dimension of living in the now. If we say we are going to give ourselves more time (for example - we'll loose the ego later) we are in fact giving our self (the ego) more time to develop.
I loved the way it was described - Tolle says when we wake up from a dream we think 'it was just a dream' and we continue on with the day. And isn't all of our life like that...? Our memories, events, people, places, emotions, fears. They may seem 'all-important' when they come barging into our lives but once they're done and we move onto the next thing we need to deal with, they dissappear into the nothingness from whence they came... therefore our worrying about them gives them their importance. These 'things' are therefore as whispy and have as much priority as a dream. All of life is like a dream - Me being the person that absolutely loves dreamland thought this was one of the most beautiful statements I had read. Life becomes more beautiful with every new discovery about it that is made.
Keep dreaming beautiful dreams...
The more I have tried to define myself, the less I am able to fit the mould of labels & fall under categories without exceptions. This is a day-by-day observation of my life. I care little of what others think of me. I yearn for travel, adventure and to become completely absorbed in new cultures and lifestyles in order to understand why and how people make the choices they do.
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Keep Dreaming
Labels:
A New Earth,
dreams,
Eckhart Tolle,
emotions,
expectations,
fears,
Now,
past,
Present
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
I am trying to lead - but I am blind
I don't know what it is that gets me when I hear about you. It's not that I want to get back together with you. The feelings I have for you are a fondness for the time we spent together. I have no desire to get back together with you now. And yet something cringes when I hear from others that they've seen you and your 'lovely girlfriend'. I know that you're struggling with something too because you've been so unwell and seem grumpy and unhappy when your friends see you. I'm sorry for what you're struggling with. Perhaps its because she is everything you asked me to be and now you're not so sure that you want that anymore. You can't be blamed for that. I did it too.
But when I think of all you've thrown away I want to kick you or shake you or scream - but you just don't seem to take any notice. For all these years we worked at trust and love and getting to know one another and their families and friends, their secrets and fears and all that time you were slowly and silently moulding me into your perfect girl and someone I wasn't but tried desperately to be for your happiness. The irony in this is you thought I was amazing when you fell in love with me but you couldn't handle other people loving who I was . You didn't want me to have that attention and to love life the way that I did and you did manage to take that away from me for the last 3 - 4 years we were together. Thank goodness I got out - I have thought this so often since we have broken up but then why do I still have a part of me hanging on to you? Because you are not a bad person and you never intended to hurt me - that is the tragedy of the situation. I hung on for so long because I knew who you were underneath but at the end of the day, it is you who must save yourself - You cannot depend on me or anyone else for your happiness. Sadly, I think it will take you a long time to learn this. But you have learnt much since we have been apart and I hope you take the time by yourself to learn this of yourself before you make a commitment I am worried that you will rush into. And yet, why am I worrying about you - when we've parted ways. I have enough to busy my thoughts.
I have met someone else and fallen in love again - I was suprised by how quickly it happened but I do love him and I am so happy with where things are going. I also know myself well enough now to know that I won't fall apart if things don't work out. I can rest in that but it is still bugging me that you still bug me like this. I hope it is just a part of getting over you and there are no other silly little strings attached to this.
But when I think of all you've thrown away I want to kick you or shake you or scream - but you just don't seem to take any notice. For all these years we worked at trust and love and getting to know one another and their families and friends, their secrets and fears and all that time you were slowly and silently moulding me into your perfect girl and someone I wasn't but tried desperately to be for your happiness. The irony in this is you thought I was amazing when you fell in love with me but you couldn't handle other people loving who I was . You didn't want me to have that attention and to love life the way that I did and you did manage to take that away from me for the last 3 - 4 years we were together. Thank goodness I got out - I have thought this so often since we have broken up but then why do I still have a part of me hanging on to you? Because you are not a bad person and you never intended to hurt me - that is the tragedy of the situation. I hung on for so long because I knew who you were underneath but at the end of the day, it is you who must save yourself - You cannot depend on me or anyone else for your happiness. Sadly, I think it will take you a long time to learn this. But you have learnt much since we have been apart and I hope you take the time by yourself to learn this of yourself before you make a commitment I am worried that you will rush into. And yet, why am I worrying about you - when we've parted ways. I have enough to busy my thoughts.
I have met someone else and fallen in love again - I was suprised by how quickly it happened but I do love him and I am so happy with where things are going. I also know myself well enough now to know that I won't fall apart if things don't work out. I can rest in that but it is still bugging me that you still bug me like this. I hope it is just a part of getting over you and there are no other silly little strings attached to this.
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